Study Sunday!
When I gotta make myself focus on school in my distracting bedroom, I light this candle. By far the best smelling candle ever… and then it’s like walking into my favorite boutiques when I walk out of my room and back in!
The little things :)
P.S. I get mine at Anthropologie but it’s also at Francesca’s.
Order this with soy milk instead of regular.
You can even skip the whipped cream; you don’t need it!
It tastes more like fall time in a cup than a regular one!
And that… is the best pumpkin spice latte you’ll ever taste. :)
I’m crushing on this sweater.
This whole picture looks comfy cozy; that’s the one way that I like my fall and winter!
A weekend full of studying means a weekend full of comfort and coffee :)
my age in two months. woo!
these just keep getting churned out. guess i’m learning lots of things in relationships these days!
“it’s okay, we’ll work through this”.
Okay, when someone says this, hold on to them for a good while. It’s really nice to be in a friendship with someone who wants to work at it as much as you do. It’s wonderful when someone cares about keeping you, close, for the rest of your lives. It’s a relief when you’re in a bad mood and the other person wants to do everything they can to fix whatever needs to be fixed between the two of you.
I’ve had relationships, as we all have, where I was afraid to say how I really felt when I was in a bad mood. Most of the time, when I tried to explain myself, the other person just looked at me like I was a crazy, emotional girl and dismissed it. They even made me believe that it was dumb of me to have some of my emotions. That always confused me, cause I’m not an over-emotional girl. It got to the place that I just stopped myself from saying what was on my mind cause I didn’t want to be ridiculed and belittled for it. Now… I’ve experienced quite the opposite, where I can say anything that’s on my mind and if I have negative feelings, they get addressed rather than made fun of.
Girls are emotional enough without someone picking on our feelings… we need someone who is going to try to understand our feelings, even if they can’t completely wrap their head around it all. But more than just being a good listener, we need someone who will be proactive. If there’s a problem in a relationship of any kind, they’ll want to fix it. They’ll find solutions and think of what can benefit both people. And they’ll reassure…. you’ll know, from both actions and words, that everything will be alright because you’ll work together, equally, and get through it. Rough spots are nothing in any type of relationship when both people are committed to getting to the other side together.
God first; significant other second.
There’s a saying that I’m sure many people have already heard before:
“I want to be so lost in God that in order for someone to find me, they have to seek Him.”
A relationship between a guy and girl where they both keep God as their top priority and focus first on Him and staying in His will is completely different from any other relationship you can be in. And that’s an understatement. A guy and girl can do all that they can think of to get closer to each other and develop their relationship, but it’s all void if they don’t include God in that process. There is nothing that pulls two people together faster and more completely than when they both seek God fervently and diligently. Not only does it strengthen their personal walks with the Lord, but it encourages each other and strengthens the bonds of that relationship because of that common communion.
Not only does it bring them closer, but there is nothing more attractive to the right guy or girl than to see the other seeking God and putting their all into worshipping Him. Looks go out the window when suddenly you see someone so fully enraptured in God’s presence; it’s unreal, because that’s the best quality you can find in someone. True, 100% dedication to God. And if you have that quality already and desire to find it in someone else, you’ll attract the right person. No one should ever have to lower that standard. Ever.
Also, establishing your own spiritual walks and prayer life is something you can bring to each other and share the strengths and weaknesses…. maybe one person’s strength is the other’s weakness, and they can encourage each other on how to be stronger in those areas. And the couple that God brings together will feel the same about spiritual matters… there will be agreement and harmony because they feel the same tugs on their heart. They won’t do their own separate works for God apart from each other but their works will bring them together and coincide with one another; their work will edify and strengthen the other’s work.
It’s really amazing how God can use a relationship between two people to do such a mighty work within the two people as well as outwardly from their relationship. But first it takes a willingness and sacrifice from both people, equally, to find God’s timing and will. You can’t jump into any relationship, even the right relationship, unless both people are prepared… standing firmly on their relationship with God and always looking to Him.
#20: Give and take.
You often hear people describe an important relationship, like with a spouse, as being a lot about give and take. It makes sense… when two people are close, and especially when they are with each other on a daily basis and in the same living space, there is going to be some disagreement and conflict sooner or later. People aren’t clones, and as much as you may have in common with someone, there are still going to be little annoyances and things you don’t see eye to eye on…. even the little things like a continual grammatical error or teeth-brushing habits. Actually it’s usually the little things that turn into big things!
Give and take is all about two people being selfless. It’s one thing to say you love each other but it’s another thing to show it… and what better way to show how much you care than by putting the other person before yourself!? Give and take isn’t supposed to be a chore… it isn’t something you do begrudgingly. You do it because you truly want to see the other person happy and even because you have a greater desire to seek harmony and peace in your relationship rather than disagreements and discord, as petty as they may be.
You can tell when someone cares when they seek out ways to avoid the little disagreements. Sure they can be funny, but then they turn into actual arguments rather than picking back and forth… you don’t realize until after these have been avoided how peaceful a relationship can be without them. And you don’t realize how much it means to someone else when you selflessly give them something they’ve wanted from you… something they’ve wanted you to try or work at, something that is important to them.
Being stubborn can be a good trait in the right times, but in a close relationship it’s just not worth it. It is always more rewarding to put your pride away and humble yourself by putting the other person’s wants above your own. And if you’re the first to do it without asking, it’ll mean that much more when they realize what you did for them and they’ll want to do something in return. That kind of love and happiness in a relationship is what should always be worked toward.
Almost exactly a month ago, I set out to Washington state to visit some friends. The plan was to fly back the next week. Did I? Nope… for once the opportunity to extend a trip happened to work out and everything I knew had to fall into place just happened to do so. I know the Lord worked everything out because I prayed His will be done, and I truly believe it was. So I added 3 weeks!
I had the most wonderful, interesting, exhausting and unforgettable experience to date.
The family I traveled with is evangelizing all over the country full-time. They’re some of my closest friends, like a second family to me. Not only did I create numerous memories with each of them and go through many ups and downs by their side, but I got to see and be a part of their ministry for three weeks as they traveled the west and preached and sang at our churches in different states.
We started out in Washington state for two weeks, then drove to Salem, Oregon for a week. Then Prineville, OR for half a week and Salt Lake City for a few days. Finally we drove home to Phoenix, AZ, taking a detour through Las Vegas and over the Hoover Dam along the way so I could see a little more of the west.
It was incredible to see the same spirit in every church and the same love and care coming from all these people we were just meeting for the first time. I got to experience first hand the exhaustion that comes with staying up late to fellowship with friends and get up early for whatever reason…. to travel, to go into town, to practice or just so everyone could get a shower in before lunch time. I got to see the love of a family, for each other and for me, and feel their protection as if I was their own. The love of God and His people is simply amazing!
I wouldn’t trade that experience for the world. Being back in TN is so foreign to me now… instead of the state and town and house that I was all too familiar with, I feel like I’m just at another stop along the way before I travel somewhere new. This doesn’t feel like “home” anymore. Some of the family will be here next week for a revival at our church. It can’t come soon enough!
God is working out in my heart and in situations where I need to be after I graduate in May, which has been a huge concern lately. I trust that He’ll lead me exactly where I’m supposed to be! It’s so wonderful to have someone like Him that I can trust so fully.
#19: “I feel pretty, oh so pretty….”
Sure they’re lyrics from a love stricken Maria in West Side Story. But there’s some truth in there, a truth I just discovered in the past few days.
There’s a close guy friend of mine, and when I’m around him I don’t think too highly of myself. I wouldn’t call myself “beautiful” in his eyes; I suddenly see someone else in the mirror looking back at me when I’m around him. I wonder who that girl is that suddenly looks drab and not quite up to par. I sit awkwardly around him because I don’t know how to be comfortable in my own skin for once. I don’t like who this girl is but I don’t know how to get her out of my head. I’m not uncomfortable around him, I’m just suddenly not comfortable around me.
There’s this other close guy friend of mine, and when I’m around him I feel beautiful. The clothes that I just throw on that day, I later realize, were actually a cute choice. I wouldn’t want to be anyone else because this friend appreciates who I am. If I changed anything about myself, we probably wouldn’t be as close, and I would never want that. I look in the mirror and wonder who that girl smiling back is because she’s so happy and has a sparkle in her eye. I sit however I want…Indian style, cross legged, one leg folded under the other…because I’m comfortable in my skin when I’m with him. I like being this happy, easy going girl. I’m comfortable around everyone, including myself, because I’m comfortable being me around him.
The first guy doesn’t come right out and degrade me. He doesn’t call me ugly, but he doesn’t call me beautiful. Sometimes it’s what girls don’t hear that speaks the loudest to them. There’s a quote by Audrey Hepburn about a pretty girl being a happy girl. If you’re happy, it shows without trying. And when you’re unhappy, that shows just as easily. Hands down, a happy girl is prettier than an unhappy girl. And that’s not a beauty that make-up and clothes and money can put on for you.
Don’t lie to yourself… be truthful when you discover the way you feel in your skin around certain people. You shouldn’t surround yourself with people like my first friend. Especially in a relationship! There needs to be a certain level of respect and admiration for each other. Who would want to be with someone that doesn’t respect them? Who would be with someone whom they don’t feel beautiful around all the time?
I fly here in almost 2 weeks. Excited is an understatement.
I’ve fallen in love with those mountains!
